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At best, they are Tops (someone only wanting to dominate sexually) who want nothing more than kinky sex either online or in real life. 2) The men who are truly interested in D/s are just as new as you are Please do not expect to find someone with any weighty real life experience. The Doms with extensive knowledge are usually already living it in real life and are not online.

You have discovered the online dominance and submission community.

Even more importantly for you, you believe you are a submissive and now wish to find a dominant for yourself. *begins laughing herself to tears*) Allow me to share with you what I have learned in four years in the online bdsm chat rooms.

Take your time and get to know him as a man before even thinking about discussing a D/s relationship. They may have a dominant personality BUT that does NOT NOT NOT make a man A Dominant in the D/s sense. 3) Many Online Dominants are simply looking for an ego boost, an orgasm, or both.

If the man is only interested in talking about kinky sex or how Domly he is, chances are he isn't really interested in you as a person at all. You have needs and desires as well as the Dominant. A lot of the Doms online are only interested in their own "wants" and will use a submissive to boost their self esteem or fulfill sexual fantasies.

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