I think in the early stages, for men 18-30, they’re just making their way in the world, and they are highly driven from a sexual perspective when it comes to women.We’re not in that place that is ready to take on full blown relationships and commitment, where women come from the place of once they have had sex with a man, they bond with him.So all of a sudden, everything becomes murky and uncertain in terms of your relationship. First, you should know that the average time for a couple to move from dating to a committed relationship, with a future that includes living together or getting married, is from nine months to four years. If you've been with your partner in an exclusive relationship for at least two or so years and he/she shows no signs of wanting to make it permanent by getting married, the first thing you have to do is to decide if you are really committed to having love in your life?All this varies considerably from couple to couple. Are truly committed to yourself and your dream of a committed, married relationship?That doesn't necessarily mean that he doesn't love you or wants to break up; it just means that he needs more time to adjust to the idea of “settling down.”This doesn't necessarily mean you need to completely remove yourself from his life or break up.Just because he can't commit now doesn't mean he won't commit later.As far as you’re concerned, you’ve found “the one” – only he isn’t quite ready to be your “number two.” He resolutely refuses to indicate his commitment.
When evaluating what to do, here are some things you need to consider: When a relationship is going well, it can be hard for you to understand that maybe your boyfriend isn't ready to fully commit.My question to you is this: if you are not going to be there for yourself, who will be?It's important that you develop your sense of SELF-WORTH if you expect your partner to really value you.One of the hardest challenges I've ever faced in a relationship was falling in love with someone who was terrified to commit.I can admit that I am a bit of a hopeless romantic when it comes to relationships, and I'm very passionate when it comes to love, so when I fall, I fall hard.In Sealing the Deal, I devote three entire chapters to not only building self-esteem but also setting the stage for commitment; how to have the talk so he will listen; and what to do if he/she won't commit.